My life as a goth -- What is a goth? -- The many faces of goth -- What is "gothic"? (a brief history of the word) -- Gothic philosophy -- Goth looks for boys and girls (gone horribly wrong) -- Dude looks like the matrix! -- There be vampyres! -- Oh, the drama! (or is it the "dramamine"?) -- Goth is easy! -- What's in a name? (everything!) -- The dance of darkness -- Gothic poem generator -- Horror poem generator -- Gothic makeover -- Cybergoth hair makeover -- My skull sweater, a matter of national security -- Why are goths hated? (because they're spooky!) -- Who do goths hate? -- Spooky vs. creepy -- Politics -- Sheep in wolf's clothing -- Marilyn Manson (goth or not goth?) -- The bitter end.